Looking through the mirror, I could see Fear, Rejection, Pain, Guilt, Resentment, Sadness and Bitterness. 
Nothing in the world could ever change my sadness. I am deeply lonely and can never be happy. I have pretended enough and now I am totally shattered. 

The anchor that holds me in my pain, stays the same. What I once used to crave, now seems to be what I absolutely detest. I was once surrounded by people who adored me and now the slightest sign of love seems to irk me. 

I began to associate LOVE with PAIN and all I wish to do is run away from it as far as I can. I managed to convince myself that I am protecting myself from feeling any pain. 

The walls I put up, the constant need of establishing boundaries, I unquenchable thirst to be alone, just by myself. I felt this phase was blissful .

  • What is it that I want? 
  • What is it that can make me happy? 
  • Do I embrace pain and remain unhappy?. 

I think am fading, I am so lost. 

Stop Over thinking


But looking through me as I stood in front of the mirror with my eyes closed, my inner self felt the need to embrace every moment with a smile…….. So I said; 
Mirrors are not to be trusted, they lie and steal your true self, they reveal only what your mind believes it see. There is every need to change. 

Embrace every moment with a smile ☺

©Elynjay, 2017.